Where The Hell Are We?
by princessdannie
Summary: The Montecito jet crashes. Mainly Sam
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters.

Summary: The Montecito jet crashes on an island in the south pacific. Does everyone survive?

Authors notes: I was up late one night, I hadn't slept for nearly 30 hours and I came up with this, a semi cheap rip off of the plane crash on lost, minus the monster and the freaky people and polar bears. Set around the end of season 4/ start of season 5 and Danny and Delinda are NOT together and Jillian has divorced Ed. Mainly Sam.

Chapter 1

"Tell me again, why are we going to Australia?" Sam asked, not fully understanding the reason she left a million dollar client in the hands of her assistant.

"Because after the success of the paintball excursion, I've decided we should go on another team building retreat," Ed told the small casino host.

"If paintballing was so successful why do we have to go to another one?" she asked.

"Because I said so," Ed growled, signally the end of the discussion.

"This sucks," Sam mumbled, as she collapsed on one of the chairs.

"I heard that," Ed said.

"Well I can't wait to get there, I want to hold a Koala Bear," Delinda said with a smile.

"Did you know Koala's aren't actually bears, they are marsupials," Mike informed her.

"Danny, what do you want to do when we get there?" Mary asked.

"I wanna relax on the beach and watch all the hot Aussie babes in their natural habitat," Danny replied, eliciting a chuckle from Mike and a glare from Ed.

"You're a pig," Sam told him.

"I'm a pig?" He asked with a raised brow.

"Yeah, you are,"

"Will you two shut up?" Ed yelled from his seat.

Sam was about to say something when the plane lurched.

Sam was thrown from her chair and hit the ground with a thud. Danny laughed. Sam glared at him, if only looks could kill.

The plane lurched again.

"What going on?" Mary asked worriedly. She never did well on planes.

"Probably just turbulence," Mike told her.

Mary gasped as the lights in the jet went out.

"I don't think this is turbulence Mike," Sam said, who was still on the floor.

Moments later the plane fell from the sky.

Sam groaned as she heard someone say her name.

"Sam? Wake up" Ed told her.

Sam slowly opened her eyes. "What happened?" She asked, as she rubbed her head, and felt a cotton patch on her forehead.

"The plane crashed, you were knocked out," Ed told her.

"How long was I out for?" Sam asked as Ed helped her to slowly sit up.

"Awhile,"

"Is everyone one alright?" Sam asked worried about her friends.

"The Pilot didn't survive, but everyone else is pretty banged up, but fine," Ed replied.

Sam got up with the help of Ed and took in her surroundings. They were on a tropical beach, the plane behind them, the front of the jet was completely destroyed but the fuselage was still intact.

"Where is everyone?" Sam asked as she noticed her friends weren't in sight.

"They're collecting wood, so we can make a fire," Ed told her.

"Ed?"

"What?"

"Where the hell are we?" Sam asked, with a small voice.

"I have no idea,"


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Everyone was sitting around the large bonfire, as the sun set.

"So does anyone have any idea where we are?" Mary asked hopefully. One of the guys would know where they were, Mike was a genius, Danny had marine training and Ed, well Ed knew everything.

"We were flying for about eleven hours, trusting we were on course, I'd say we are somewhere near Nauru," Mike replied. Silently hoping they were on course.

"Will anyone be able to find us?" Delinda asked her dad.

"Yeah, there is a GPS tracking system in the jet."

"Ha ha," Sam laughed from inside the fuselage "found it,"

"Found what?" Danny asked curious, but kind of scared, it was Sam after all.

"Tequila," She said with a smile, as she appeared with a few bottles in her arms, "hey it's not Cognac, but it will do," remembering the last retreat they were forced to go to.

Sam passed the bottles around but kept one for herself.

"Nice thinking Sam," Delinda said as she raised her bottle to her lips. Everyone but Ed nodded their heads in agreement.

"Is this what you did at the last retreat? Get drunk?" Ed asked.

Everyone looked away from Ed.

"Hey Mike, it's a shame Sarasvati isn't here," Danny chuckled.

"Why what happened with Sarasvati?" Sam asked, quickly looking at Mike.

Mike glared at Danny.

"Mike! You didn't?" Mary gasped.

Sam and Delinda laughed.

"Remember her with the strippers?" Sam asked the girls before laughing again.

"Hey lets play truth or dare," Delinda said excitedly.

"Are you department heads? Or children?" Ed asked.

"Come on Daddy, it'll be fun,"

"Sam, truth or dare?" Delinda asked.

"Why am I going first?" Sam asked. "Truth" she replied without waiting for Delinda's answer.

"Have you ever been extremely intimate with someone in a public place and where was it?" Delinda asked.

"Hey that's two questions," Sam objected.

"Just answer," Danny told her.

"Fine, yes I have had sex in public," Sam said with confidence.

"Where?" Delinda asked.

Sam looked down at her lap, blushing, "in the elevators at the Montecito," she said quietly.

"Sam!" Ed exclaimed.

"Why didn't we see that?" Mike asked Danny, usually they saw that kind of stuff in the surveillance room.

"With who?" Mary asked.

"Danny truth or dare?" Sam asked, refusing to answer Mary's question.

"Truth,"

"If you were to win a lottery and you had to give it away to someone from this group, who would it be and why?"

"Um, Mary. Because I've borrowed a lot of money from her over the years and I still haven't paid it back yet,"

"So the only way I'll get my money back is if you win the lottery?" Mary asked with a smile.

Everyone else laughed.

"Delinda, Truth or Dare?"

"Truth," Delinda replied.

"Ask carefully Danny," Ed warned not wanting to hear about his daughter's sex life.

"Who has presented you with the worst gift so far with our secret Santa?"

"Sam, she gave me back the shoes she borrowed, they were gift wrapped and everything,"

"I forgot they were yours!" Sam said trying to defend herself.

"That's really bad Sam," Ed told her with a chuckle.

"Mary truth or dare?" Delinda asked.

"Truth,"

"Would you kiss the person next to you?" Delinda asked.

Mary looked to the people sitting next to her, Sam on her left and Mike on her right. One she had already kissed and one she hadn't.

"Sorry Mike,"

"That hurts Mare,"

Danny looked at Sam and noticed she wouldn't make eye contact with Mary, "hey Sam what's wrong?" he asked with a smile.

"What? Nothing," she replied defensively.

"Truth or dare Mike?" Mary asked.

"Truth,"

"Why are you all picking truth, its truth or dare remember?" Ed asked.

"While you've been in surveillance what has freaked you out the most?" Mary asked, ignoring Ed.

"It's either seeing Miguel chop his finger off or the topless grannies," Mike answered; a cold chill ran down his spine.

Sam laughed, "Remember how freaked out they were when they thought there was a crap in the pool?"

Delinda laughed, it was funny.

"That was mean Sam, they could have had a heart attack," Mary said with a hint of a smile on her face, she had to admit though; it was a good idea to get them out of Bella Peddo.

"What did you do Sam?" Ed asked, why hadn't he heard about this?

"What? It was just chocolate," Sam said with her trademark grin.

Ed just shook his head.

"Truth or dare, Mr D?"

"Truth,"

"What happened to 'Why are you all picking truth, its truth or dare remember?'?" Danny asked, imitating Ed's voice.

"Who would you date in this group?" Mike asked.

"I should have picked dare," Ed mumbled to himself.

"Come on Ed, me or Mare?" Sam asked, aware that they were his only choices, unless Ed had suddenly turned gay.

After a moment of thought Ed answered "Both."

"Hey that's a cop out! Pick one," Danny said.

"Sam," Ed replied.

"Ed I'm honoured," Sam giggled.

"Why?" Mike asked.

"Sorry Mike my turns finished. Sam truth or dare" Ed asked.

"Truth," Sam answered, forgetting about her admission earlier.

"Who did you have sex with in the elevator?"

"Woody," Sam answered almost inaudibly.

"Really? I would have thought Casey," Delinda said, surprised.

A look of disgust crossed Sam's face.

"Dee?" Sam asked

"Dare,"

"I dare you to wear you're underwear on your head,"

"Seriously?" Delinda asked.

Sam nodded with her trade mark grin.

Delinda got up and disappeared for a few moments, coming back with lace panties on her head.

"This is so embarrassing," Delinda said, giving Sam the dirtiest look.

"Danny, truth or dare,"

"Dare," he replied.

"I dare you to sit in Mike's lap for the rest of the game," Delinda said, causing everyone but Danny and Mike to laugh.

"No way,"

"You can't back out," Sam told him.

"Fine," Danny said, giving up, there was no point arguing with Sam.

He got up and sat in Mike's lap. "I think you should cut out on junk food for a while man," Mike said.

"Shut up," Danny told him.

"Mare, your turn," Danny said.

"Truth,"

"Have you and Sam ever kissed and if so, how many times?" Danny said, he'd hoped he could pick Mary. He wanted to know why Sam couldn't make eye contact earlier.

"Sorry Sam, yes, once that we know of,"

"What do you mean, that you know of?" Delinda asked in shock.

Sam closed her eyes in embarrassment.

"Remember that night we went to the strippers with Mike's ex-girlfriend, the lesbian?" Delinda nodded, "well we woke up next to each other the next morning and couldn't remember anything,"

"Why do all the juicy questions involve me?" Sam asked no one, " I can't take anymore embarrassment, I'm going to bed, wake me when the rescue party gets here," Sam said as she got up, taking her tequila with her.

"I'm gunna go too, good night," Ed told the group, following Sam into the fuselage.

"Party poopers," Delinda shouted.

"Do you think Sam's upset?" Mary asked concerned that she had hurt her friend.

"She'll be fine, she probably wont even remember," Danny told her.

Inside the fuselage.

Sam grabbed two blankets and pillows from inside the luggage compartment and handed a set to Ed. And set up a bed on one the recliner chairs.

Before lying down, she finished the last of her bottle of tequila.

"Sam are you alright?" Ed asked.

"Fine, why?" Sam asked as she crawled into her bed.

"Well you seemed angry when Mary told everyone about the kiss and you just drank a quarter of a bottle of tequila in one go,"

"I'm fine Ed, good night," Sam told him. She rolled over and pulled the blanket over her head, hiding her from the world.

"Good night,"


End file.
